Hello You,
Watching ITV this evening (I know, I'm so sorry, it was just the prospect of new Catchphrase, but more on that later), I noted some particular elements.
a) A football fan punched a police horse. This is NOT okay. Feel free to punch the man riding the horse, you ignorant prat, but I will punch you if you try it on a horse. I know you're probably angry because you look like the sort of person who would buy horsemeat-ridden products from Tesco (apologies for this sweeping generalisation, dear reader, but I need some way to vent this anger), but I don't think this particular horse was responsible for that. It was potentially a Romanian slaughterhouse, but that's all I'm saying on that particular scandal. In the same news report, I saw a fascist jumping around and looking a lot like a tosser which, incidentally, he is.
b) Catchphrase's return has made my life. Not sure about the fact that there are three contestants now, and all three of them were idiots who probably couldn't spell Catchphrase if you gave them the first eleven letters, but I enjoyed it nonetheless. I'm glad that the old presenter and his terrifying voice have gone, but Stephen Mulhern should be in an attic that plays cartoons at the weekends. A jolly big high-five to you if you got that CITV reference.
c) How old do you have to be to go on Catchphrase? I think I could win, even though the clues are in a higher resolution than they were in the episodes of yesteryear and, by the logic of maths, 3D is more difficult to comprehend than 2D.
I'm not joking- I've alway preset the recorder for next week's Catchphrase.
Yours gameshowingly,
M.
P.S. I haven't taken my hat off since I finished it; I even had a bath in it.
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